The Cold Hard Ugly Truth About Spirituality – 8 Truths

When I first began the practice of spirituality, my main intention was to discover why I was having ‘weird’ experiences. As I progressed deeper understanding unfolded, along with the cold, hard ugly truth about spirituality – we can never unsee or unknow what we learn. Here are some points for contemplation – maybe you resonate.

The Cold Hard Ugly Truth About Spirituality

There is a lot written—by me and many others—about spiritual awakening, personal growth, and developing self-awareness and mindfulness.

These are beautiful, meaningful practices. They change lives. And yet some cold hard ugly truths about spirituality rarely get talked about.

These truths aren’t about the practices themselves, which can be deeply beneficial. They’re about what begins to happen as a result of progressing on the spiritual path.

You may discover, sometimes abruptly, that:

• Injustice still exists—spiritually aware or not.
• Not everyone is “good,” trustworthy, or interested in growth.
• Suffering and loss can arrive at any moment.
• Being intuitive or psychic can be overwhelming.
• The spiritual journey includes darkness, not just “high vibration” spaces.

Our interactions with people and life circumstances can drop us into difficult moods and challenging places—often precisely because our awareness is expanding.

Cynicism or Truth?

When I was a teen, I thought my dad was hopelessly cynical when he’d say, “80% of people are no good.”

What he was really pointing to was this: many people are still wrestling with the pull of ego over mind, survival over evolution. As a collective, we’re still far from spiritual maturity.

Some people cannot or will not shift their karmic patterns in this lifetime. Whether consciously or unconsciously, they choose to live out those patterns—and others can get hurt in the process.

As M. Scott Peck wrote in The Road Less Traveled:

“Life is not fair, but people can choose to be.”

That lesson alone can take a lifetime to integrate.

And once we begin facing our own karmic patterns, the question becomes: what happens next?

1. Friends and Relationships Fall Away

I’ve heard this from many people—and lived it myself.

You may keep a few soul-level friends who walk the journey with you, but the reality is this: when you choose a spiritual path, you’ll likely lose friends and even distance yourself from family.

Your worldview shifts. Your vibration shifts. And your expression naturally shifts with it.

Vibrational expansion changes our aura

People feel the difference. Some resonate more deeply with you. Others pull away because you’re no longer a match.

It’s part of maturation. You begin to see old behavioral patterns in others with new clarity. Sometimes you simply outgrow dynamics that once felt “normal.”

Becoming the black sheep

From the family’s perspective, it can look like you’ve lost the plot or are rejecting tradition—and in a way, you might be.

But the upside of this cold hard ugly truth is that new friends will emerge—people who feel like family because they match your newly aligned frequency.

I’ve always loved the quote:

“You meet people, but you recognize friends.”

On a spiritual path, resonance becomes unmistakable.

When family is unsafe

Many of us developed intuitive or empathic abilities because we had to—our early environment required us to “read the room.”

Once we heal and expand, abusive or unconscious dynamics become intolerable.
As Louise Hay once said:

“Only honor family members who are honorable.”

This alone can be a revolutionary act.

2. The Cold Hard Ugly Truth Gives You Clarity

One of the most shocking discoveries on the journey is how quickly your self-awareness grows.

You see motivations, patterns, and intentions that once went unnoticed.
This is embodiment, not just living in your head, but feeling truth in your body.

Sometimes it’s overwhelming—spiritual TMI.

You begin to see why people behaved as they did.

Karmic threads are revealed.

You see where someone’s “love” or “interest” had more to do with their needs than yours.

It’s never easy, but it’s profoundly clarifying.

3. Your Projections Will Be Revealed

When we project our needs onto others, we fill in their missing pieces with fantasy or hope.

The moment those projections drop, everything can shift.
Your worldview reorganizes itself around what’s actually true.

A mentor of mine used to say:

“Shift the filter, force the sort.”

Once the filter shifts, new choices appear—and they’re often very different from the ones you saw before.

Signs of vibrational expansion

• Relationship dynamics become transparent.
• You see people as they are, not as you wish they were.
• Old illusions fall away.
• Paradigm shifts come in waves.

As Maya Angelou said:

“When somebody shows you who they are—believe them.”

Cognitive dissonance—the refusal to see the truth because it benefits us to stay blind—dissolves once awareness rises.

4. More Truth About Humans (and Humanity)

My first paradigm shift happened when I was 13.

I read about cultures where girls were mutilated before marriage—a brutal, patriarchal practice justified as “tradition.”

It was my first glimpse of the cold hard ugly truth about the world.

I realized then that being born in a certain country had given me a privilege I hadn’t understood before.

Over time, I learned even more about how patriarchal systems shape women’s lives, opportunities, and safety—often invisibly.

5. Shift Happens—Again and Again

Spiritual evolution rarely happens alone. Collective shifts occur, too.

Examples include:

• Realizing the food industry does not support our health
• Waking up to environmental harm from plastic and petroleum
• Seeing photoshopped teenage bodies as abusive conditioning
• The #MeToo movement
• Acknowledging the urgent need for gun reform
• Recognizing the effects of patriarchal power structures
• Understanding that intuitive or “spiritual” people are not always trustworthy

These shifts change how we relate to society—and to each other.

6. Narcissists Exist

Empaths and narcissists often attract each other in painful, destructive loops.

In the Aquarian Age, awareness of these dynamics is rising. This awakening exposes abusive power patterns and forces us to reclaim sovereignty.

This too is a cold hard ugly truth—but one that protects us.

7. Patriarchal Ideas Block Evolution

Growing up in the ’80s, I wore shoulder pads, lowered my voice, and shaped myself to fit a male-dominated professional world.

This wasn’t just fashion—it was survival. Subconsciously, we learn to adapt to environments that weren’t built with us in mind.

Over time, it becomes clear how much patriarchal energy has shaped our possibilities—and our limitations.

8. You Can Never Go Back

Once you see, you cannot unsee.

Like Joseph Campbell’s hero’s journey or Lissa Rankin’s heroine’s journey, spiritual awakening transforms your inner landscape.

The river is no longer just a river.
The valley is no longer just the valley.
Your perception shifts permanently.

As my friend Harry Nichols says:

“Once you know, you cannot unknow.”

It’s one of the deepest cold hard ugly truths—and one of the greatest gifts.

Learn More About The Akashic Records Readings I Offer

One way to grow your psychic ability is to begin to work with your Akashic Records. This expands the connection to your Soul through your Higher Self (also known as your intuition).

If you are interested in an Akashic Records Reading, I always recommend starting withthe Soul Star Reading.

This reading gives you 3 different immersive experiences of the Akashic Records: –

1. Connecting with your Divine Soul Blueprint (Soul-level gifts, talents, abilities).
2. Hearing about a Past Life that contains a karmic pattern ready for clearing (you’ll recognize this pattern in your present life).
3. Recognizing and clearing present life blocks and restrictions.

If you’d like to know about the different readings I offer on this site, start here>>

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