Big Fat Lies Women Tell Themselves | Amy Ahlers ditches her Inner Critic | Book Review by Mom On A Spiritual Journey
Big Fat Lies Women Tell Themselves – your secret is out!
Don’t believe me? All you have to do is open the first few pages of the book and look at the table of contents…and you will see every single big fat lie you have told yourself listed in this book by category, no less.
These are the ones we probably HAVEN’T told anyone, not even our best female buddy over a Starbucks coffee, because many of them are unconscious and we say them in our minds without even being aware of what we’re doing.
Here’s just a couple of examples from a total of 59 big fat lies (and these are the ones that resonate for me)…under the categories –
Big Fat Lies About…Your Worth (aka The Mother Lode)
- Lie #4 I should have known better
- Lie #12 When I get ______, then I’ll be happy
Big Fat Lies About Body and Self-Care
- Lie #16 One of these days I’ll win the battle of the bulge
- Lie #17 I cannot ask for help or support unless I’m in a crisis
Big Fat Lies About…Being Authentic
- Lie #51 It’s tolerable
- Lie #52 Feeling this way now means that I’ll always feel this way
Why ditch our Inner Critics? Because they are Big Fat Liars and they’re not good for our health!
Amy Ahlers makes the very valid point early on in this book that negative self-talk is causing women to be stressed out and to feel down on themselves. With a best friend like our Inner Critic, who needs enemies?
Negative self-talk is dis-empowering in so many ways and now that we have tools to help clear this kind of unconscious behavior, we can improve our internal landscape and affect how our daughters talk to themselves too.
Where I’m at with the book and my Inner Critic
I have met my inner critic before when I started working with NLP™ (Neuro-Linguistic Programming™) which is a behavioral model to help improve language and change habitual behaviors that don’t serve us well.
What’s interesting about this book, as opposed to my NLP™ experience, is that in the past I visualized my Inner Critic as a kind of ‘dark twin’ who was always trying to talk my ‘lighter side’ out of feeling good. (I’m a Gemini, so this analogy works well for me!).
One of the first exercises Amy asks us to do in Big Fat Lies Women Tell Themselves
is to visualize and draw our Inner Critic.
This has bought ‘her’ (or that part of myself) into much sharper focus and I will draw her soon…and share her picture on here as I work through more of this book (she’s pursing her lips in disapproval as I write!).
Big Fat Lies Women Tell Themselves – the book and some other resources
If you want to hear more from Amy Ahlers and this body of work she’s created, she’s appeared on The View, here’s the link http://wakeupcallcoaching.com/press
Amy on Twitter: @wakeupcallcoach
Her Facebook Page is http://www.facebook.com/wakeupcallcoach
I’ll keep in touch on here as I work through some of my Big Fat Lies.
The secret really is out – if everybody has Big Fat Lies and a lot of them are the same…then we bring them out into the light and take their power away.