What No-One Tells You About Bad People – Narcissists And Sociopaths
What can we truly learn about “bad people,” and what’s most important to understand about them?
Table of contents
- Bad People — How Many Are There, Really?
- Are Most People Really Bad?
- Who Are the “Really Bad” People?
- Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
- How to Recognize a Personality-Disordered Person
- The “Truly Bad” — Psychopaths, Sociopaths, and Grandiose Narcissistic Disorder
- Learn More About The Akashic Records Readings I Offer
- Download the PDF Akashic Records for Beginners
Bad People — How Many Are There, Really?
My dad was a deeply introspective man who often felt unfairly treated by life. He used to say to me:
“Eighty percent of people are no good.”
Despite being a British engineer from the 1950s onward, he read Khalil Gibran and other uplifting writers. I like to think of him as a progressive soul, a different kind of thinker, even if shaped by a patriarchal upbringing.
The Prophet by Khalil Gibran on Amazon.
His childhood was tough. By his account, he received little in the way of consistent parenting. His mother had him in her early forties, considered scandalous in those days, and she struggled with her own challenges. Fortunately, her sister lived next door and made sure he was fed and bathed at least once a week.
My dad often spoke about “cuckoo children.”
Cuckoos lay their eggs in other birds’ nests and push the other chicks out.
It angered him to see parents bring children into the world only to abandon or neglect them. I believe he was speaking from his own experience.
Are Most People Really Bad?
I don’t believe the majority of people are bad. Rather, there are good ideas and bad ideas, and if we process those ideas through the brain, body, and soul, we can change our nature.
But some people are truly “bad to the bone.” Were they made that way, or is something deeper going on?
Few people escape life without trauma. For most, their responses to pain explain much of their behavior. But for a small number, the story runs differently.
Who Are the “Really Bad” People?
After much reading and reflection, I’ve come to see three main groups: –
- Psychopathic Disorders – Born that way, perhaps carrying this pattern through multiple lifetimes.
- People with Antisocial Personality Disorder – Shaped that way, often through loveless or neglectful upbringing and an absence of empathy modeling.
- People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder – Wounded that way, usually through early abandonment or the expectation to parent their own parents, emotionally or otherwise.
- People with Borderline Personality Disorder – exhibiting impulsive behavior influenced by an unhealthy self-image.
These tendencies can combine in many unpleasant ways.
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
Some people show traits of these disorders without being fully destructive. This may present as Borderline Personality Disorder; someone persistently difficult to relate to, sometimes unpleasant, but often quite charming.
If you’re friends or acquaintances with such a person, you might never see their darker side. That’s part of the problem: those closest to them often endure verbal, emotional, or even physical abuse because of the person’s innate insecurities, while outsiders see only the “nice” version.
How to Recognize a Personality-Disordered Person
People with narcissistic or borderline traits can hide their true personalities at first. After all, if they showed their cruelty (narcissistic) or difficulties (borderline) early on, you’d run a mile.
Empaths and intuitives must learn to read the signals. Here’s a simple checklist:
- Do they talk mostly about themselves?
- Are they love-bombing you — showering you with charm and attention too quickly?
- Do they have a long list of people who’ve “done them wrong”?
- Do you feel subtle red flags but ignore them because you like the connection?
If two or more of these resonate, your boundaries may already be crossed.
When that happens, pause. Step back. Take your time. Get to know them through their actions and through what others say, not just their own version of events. Spend as much time with their family members, too, so that you can spot any weird patterns of behavior.
The “Truly Bad” — Psychopaths, Sociopaths, and Grandiose Narcissistic Disorder
Research now shows that some extreme personality disorders correlate with differences in brain structure.
People who are classified as psychopaths often show reduced connections in the prefrontal cortex in a brain scan, the region linked to empathy and guilt. They are literally wired differently.
People with antisocial personality disorder may have once-typical brains but suffered trauma that “burned out” their empathy circuits. Their ability to connect simply doesn’t come back after the trauma they went through.
People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder show abnormalities in areas related to empathy and self-reflection in a brain scan. They carry an “essential wound”. This is a disconnection from their true selves formed by early trauma.
Narcissists vs. the Others
Narcissists are often more socially adept than psychopaths or sociopaths. They read people well, studying expressions, tone, and emotion to mimic connection.
But they don’t feel it. They use it. They need your attention, energy, and admiration. You become their “supply.” So sometimes they are nice, and sometimes they are nasty. They may play this Jekyll and Hyde game with you in cycles.
This wave of nasty and nice will keep you hooked in if you have already invested a lot of time in the relationship. As empaths and Highly Sensitive People, our primary focus is most commonly placed on healing and connection. So we might find ourselves bound to someone with Borderline Personality Disorder or Narcissistic Personality Disorder, because we want to help them heal.
Especially in the case of a Narcissistic Personality disorder, the constant cycle between nice and nasty will keep us living in hope.
People who are classified as psychopaths, and people with antisocial behavioral personality disorder (sociopathy), by contrast, don’t need you; they simply enjoy controlling or exploiting you.
What They All Share
All three types process fear and anxiety differently. Their autonomic nervous systems, which are responsible for the fight-or-flight response, react differently from ours.
As psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula explains, imagine being pulled over by the police. Most people feel anxious, sweaty, and flustered.
A person with a narcissistic personality disorder, an antisocial behavioral personality disordered person, or a person classified as a psychopath? They’ll feel irritated or inconvenienced when they are pulled over, but not afraid. Their emotional response is shallow and detached.
Why Empaths Must Learn About “Bad People”
As empathic souls, part of our growth is learning discernment, understanding how we operate in the world, and recognizing those who do not share our capacity for empathy.
It’s not about becoming cynical; it’s about becoming conscious.
We must learn to balance compassion with clarity. To learn to stop giving by default and start observing who truly earns our trust.
I like to think I have evolved from my father’s viewpoint in this way. I’m compassionate, yes, but no longer blind to the cuckoos in the nest.
Learn More About The Akashic Records Readings I Offer
One way to grow your psychic ability is to begin to work with your Akashic Records. This expands the connection to your Soul through your Higher Self (aka your intuition).
If you are interested in an Akashic Records Reading, I always recommend starting with the Soul Star Reading.
This reading gives you 3 different immersive experiences of the Akashic Records: –
- Connecting with your Divine Soul Blueprint (Soul-level gifts, talents, abilities).
- Hearing about a Past Life that contains a karmic pattern ready for clearing (you’ll recognize this pattern in your present life).
- Recognizing and clearing present life blocks and restrictions.
If you’d like to know about the different readings I offer on this site, start here>>
